Changing focus

I have mentioned a few times that I am changing some parts of my project (or really just changing a few projects in particular that collectively add up to my dissertation). I developed one large piece of it for my prelim proposal and submitted it for funding, but preliminary fieldwork convinced me that it is not worth the risk so I'm doing something else instead. With the shift in project focus, I have mostly eliminated much of Melody's area of research. I just realized this the other day while looking over my prelim presentation. I am really interested in her type of work but somehow the projects I am planning to work on now don't have that element. It makes me a little bit sad that my prelim project isn't going to work out, because it was going to be beautiful. Like, really really awesome. If only the critters would cooperate and the equipment were inexpensive! Anyways, I'll meet with Melody to discuss how to incorporate her area of expertise into my revised projects.

Speaking of shifting interests, I'm a little worried that Leo will remove himself from my committee since my project is now largely outside his realm of interest. But, after all of my adventures scheduling this committee meeting, Leo can't attend due to a family emergency. I'll have to catch up with him next week by myself and see what happens then. My meeting is tomorrow morning. I think I'm ready. I went over it with Herb this morning and he seemed to think it was fine. It's only an hour, and it can't run over

Dissertation progress

In preparation for my committee meeting this week I have really had to sit down and make decisions about which projects I want to do (or don't want to do). In December last year I was struck by the realization that there are so many projects that I could do at my field site based on my interests. This was liberating to me because I spent part of last semester struggling to find what I was excited about doing in the field. Then I just had to lay them all out (using FreeMind helped me conceptually organize my ideas) and decide which ones to pursue.

This week I will present my committee with a draft table of contents for my dissertation including chapter titles and a brief synopsis. Putting this together has really made me see how far I have come. I spent much of last year feeling like I was 'behind' because I didn't have any data yet. Now when I look at my table of contents I see that I have collected data for one chapter, one chapter will be a review, and one will be based on other forthcoming data that I don't have to collect. I already have what I need to write two of my five dissertation chapters. It was like I woke up one day and POOF! there is was. Ok, not really (since I spent 3 months in the field for some of that)- but that's how the realization felt. I have to collect data for just two more chapters and some side projects (in case one or more of the projects fail). Holy crap! That makes it seem like I'm making serious headway on this Ph.D. thing, which I didn't realize until about 2 weeks ago.

I actually have too many projects outlined at this point to fit in my dissertation. I sent Herb a rough draft of my table of contents with 9 chapters and he said I needed to relegate 3-4 of them to appendixes. But... you mean I can't keep them all? I can see how grad students can delay their completion by thinking they haven't done enough yet and that they need to collect more data. I can see myself falling into that trap. But as far as I'm concerned, this is an exciting problem to have. After all, too much is always enough. I'll have enough for a dissertation.

Timelines

One of the things I need to do in preparation for my committee meeting next week is present a general timeline of how I expect my different projects (=chapters) of my dissertation will proceed. Uncertainty about this timeline has been giving me some grief. For example, I have been unsure when I will return to Ukenzagapia after this next field season, and also unsure how many trips I have left. Most of this uncertainty has come from not knowing which of the many possible projects I will pursue.

At this point I have settled on four projects that require fieldwork, plus a review paper and a project based on existing data. That's six chapters and I only need four or five, but it's likely that one of those won't work out for some reason or another. I will also pursue some side projects in the field if/when I have time.

I laid out a rough timeline for each project. Sometimes I worked forwards from from the present, and sometimes I worked backwards from my goal of defending my dissertation in summer 2013. In some ways that seems like a long time away, but then when I started laying down project timelines it feels much, much closer. I also worked backwards from the goal of being totally done with fieldwork by early 2012 (preferably by November 2011 if I can do it). This is a serious goal for me because we really can't don't really want to start trying to have kids until I finish my fieldwork. It doesn't seem like a good idea for me to pregnant during my fieldwork in Africa, though I would be curious to hear if any readers have had adventurous pregnancies (in that sense, not the medical sense). I also put some other personal events on the timeline just for reference.

It feels great to have this timeline done because now I feel like I can begin to make decisions about these projects knowing generally how they should proceed in a timely manner. I can also present the timeline to my committee (minus the personal stuff) so that they are also thinking under the appropriate timeframe.

Lack of concentration

I just couldn't concentrate on anything. I had a few meetings that were good, but this afternoon I was either falling asleep or procrastinating. I just couldn't focus on preparing for my committee meeting (tons of work left to do) or finishing revisions to the note that needs to be resubmitted. Finally I did something productive and bought my travel health insurance. There wasn't even a Happy Hour today, which, it turns out, actually motivates me to keep working until 5. My office mate and I skipped out at 4:15 and went to the grocery. Blah. I've got some work to do this weekend.

A year ago

My sister died a year ago today. I spent the day writing to her, talking with family, watching old home movies, and reflecting. A year ago from right now there was nothing that I could have done to prevent her death. A year has passed. She has passed. I am not past the guilt, regret, and pain. Will it come to pass?

Even more of my life in comics: writing to professors

This comic neatly conveys my experience today where I spent several hours composing one particular email. I started to reply, did some internet research, re-read earlier emails, read the entire thread to Jon, and finally sent the damn thing off several hours later (after eating dinner and watching The Wire). I'm sure it will take the recipients about 2 minutes to read and respond. Ai!

Done, done, and done!

Today I...
...bought tickets for my next trip
...ordered cameras for my field assistants
...gave a great presentation

Not a bad day. I'm very happy with how my presentation went. I was on. It might have helped that I had about half a beer before I started talking. There were some fantastic questions from the audience and I met some interesting people, including some children's authors. All in all a productive day.

I've still got a lot to do before I leave in 3 weeks. Just 3 weeks! The big things-
-send the short note someplace else after finishing revisions
-complete a general timeline for the rest of my fieldwork
-meet with my committe
-present at lab meeting
-nail down my methods for this project
-I think there is something else that I'm forgetting.

I'm excited about this next trip. I'll be gone for about 9 weeks, which isn't too long but long enough- I'm missing Jon's birthday and our first anniversary :-(  I'll return just in time for my cousin's graduation from SFC. Yay!

Timescales in graduate school

I've been meaning to write this post for well over a year now and I want to get it out there while I'm still getting used to the mental transition*. Since beginning grad school, I've had to adjust the timescale on which I think about my life. Of course I have set and achieved some long-term goals before this**, such as applying to grad school or traveling with Jon. Both of those things happened well over a year after deciding to do them. But this feels different in a way that I can't put my finger on. I felt this adjustment most acutely at the beginning of my second year. I was starting to think about prelims, field seasons, and how these things fit into my personal life.

When I graduated from college, I spent a few transient years living in different places and traveling before I started grad school. In any given year I didn't know where I'd be the following year. That kind of uncertainty makes it difficult to make plans for one year later let alone many years.

Graduate school has filled some unknowns with knowns. Next year we'll still be living in Big City. Two years from now we'll still be living in Big City. Probably even 3 years from now unless I finish in lightning speed. Now I'm in a position where I can and must take a long view of my decisions. In fall 2008 I was beginning my prelim proposal. I was writing a proposal that I knew I wouldn't really be able to begin collecting data for until probably late 2010- two years in the future at that time. Two years. It felt like forever. I didn't submit that proposal for funding until last summer and I still haven't heard back yet. I'm getting used to the fact that many things take at least a year. Sam and Herb have said things like, "Well, your mistakes in the field might add several months or a year to your Ph.D., but that's normal." The first time I heard that I wasn't sure I'd heard correctly. You mean I might make a mistake that costs a year and no one blinks an eye? A year used to feel like forever!

I'm still getting used to this idea of setting concrete goals years in the future. For example, in two years (by January 2012) I would like to be completely finished with my fieldwork in Ukenzagapia. My goal is to finish my Ph.D. in summer 2013. That will give me a year and half to analyze and write after I finish data collection. That means I've got at least 3.5 years left, since things are likely to take longer than I expect. Part of what I need to do for my next committee meeting is present them with a likely timeline for different projects, especially those with field work. I've been putting off this task for weeks because it feels daunting.

It has been helpful for me to hear professors talk about the timelines for their projects. For example, in the database project I'm working on with Sam, he expects that it will take 8-10 years from the time he conceived of the idea to the time it is fully functional. I've got to develop my ability to take a long view of projects and commit to them. Before grad school I couldn't have conceived of choosing such a long commitment to a project because there were so many uncertainties about how my interests or career would develop. Now that I have a direction, I can take out my spotting scope and see distant but real possibilities instead of just looking at my immediate surroundings and wondering which way to go. Now I just need to start putting timelines on those landmarks.

*Part of me wants to hold onto this post and continue to polish and revise it but I think I just need to get it out there. Please comment if you can articulate your own experience with this phenomenon (or lack thereof). I think it might help me eventually write more clearly on this topic.
**Clearly, completing a four-year degree is a long timescale by this standard, but it feels much different. Perhaps because as an undergrad the structure of the timescale is defined for you by terms and your options are defined by courses. This kind of long-term planning in grad school is a different kind of animal.

Committees... again

I originally wanted to have my committee meeting in mid-January. Then when that wasn't going to be possible, I wanted to have it last week at the end of January. Several people's schedules made that impossible, so now I have pushed the date to February 10 and am planning to leave for the field just two weeks later.

This meeting is important because I am no longer actively pursuing the high-risk project I defended in my prelims last spring. My committee felt that rather than develop and present a proposal for my entire dissertation that I should instead focus on a clear component of it that I could submit for funding. I tested some of the methods last summer, and I just don't think it's worth the risk. So, I've got to describe my new plan to my committee. Last year I presented them with a theoretical table of contents (of which the high-risk project was only one chapter), and this year I will do the same. I need to be sure that everyone is on the same page with the direction my dissertation is headed so that none of them feel excluded or push me to go in a different direction because they misunderstand the new project focus.

My committee meeting is only supposed to be an hour, but it's hard for me to imagine how it can be kept to that time. I suppose I will continue discussions with individual professors (which should be happening anyway) if we start to run overtime. Herb told me to prepare a short 10-15 minute presentation, but I suspect that the committee will ask me questions throughout the presentation, turning my 15 minutes into 45. I just want to be sure that they agree on my projects and the timeline for them.

Short notice

Friday morning I received an email asking if I could give a presentation.
On Tuesday.
To the people that fund my research.

Gah! It only has to be 5-10 minutes for a non-scientific audience, but still! As I've written before, it takes me a long time to figure out the best way to present something. Just because it's a short presentation doesn't mean it will be a breeze to prepare.

On the bright side, these people have already funded me, so it's not a hard sell. I just need to keep them excited about what I'm doing.

I've got half a dozen or more posts to finish or start writing, but the week just got away from me. I am hoping to get some of those thoughts out soon.

more of my life in comics

Why does this happen? This was totally me today!

Getting ready to go

I've spent most of the day working on logistics for my next trip to the field. I am looking at departing at the end of February and returning in early May. Based on my calculations, I need about 9 weeks in Ukenzagapia to accomplish everything for this trip.

Here's what I've done today:
-Priced out airfare and emailed a travel agent for a quote. Tickets are thankfully relatively inexpensive this time.
-Placed an order for equipment.
-Identified other items that still need to be acquired, repaired, or replaced.
-Examined my budget. This time I have 3 pots of money from which to cover expenses. I'm trying to determine the best way to use each of them to minimize the $$$ that we have to float using our own funds (I can't get reimbursed for some of the in-country cash expenses until I return).

I've still got a lot to figure out, but I'm starting to check things off. I think I'll get my plane tickets this week, and then I'll have a departure date for sure! I'm getting excited to go back.

Reader question: An ecologist's education, so far?

Today I received a great email from a reader, Sarah:

 ...I was wondering if you'd be willing to answer some questions about your schooling and what you do concerning ecology. I'm a junior in high school and I'd like to be an ecologist like yourself someday.

I of course replied yes, so she wrote back with questions:

Okay so my first question is just to clear things up for me. You have a PHD but you're still in grad school? How did you get to your current level of education and how long did it take? (ex. went to a 4-year college for bachelors, then back for masters, and PHD... etc.) and another question is what are some pros and cons to ecology? (Just in general, could be about learning about ecology in college or your research.)

First things first. I don't have my Ph.D. yet, but I am working on it. Technically I am a Ph.D. candidate because I have passed my preliminary exams. Being a Ph.D. candidate is kind of like being a presidential candidate- you're in the running but haven't earned the title yet. A Ph.D. candidate describes more specifically the type of graduate student that I am (a graduate student can be anyone pursing a Masters or Ph.D.). When I finish my Ph.D., then I can be called Karina Anirak, Ph.D., or Dr. Karina Anirak.

As far as education goes, here's a brief story of how I got to where I am now. I graduated from high school and went to college where I earned a Bachelor's degree in Biology (that took 4 years). I contemplated graduate school, but was not ready to apply because I wanted to gain more work experience in research or education and use that time to reflect on whether or not I really wanted to go to grad school, and if so, for what. Grad school, in any field, is not something you should do because you don't know what else to do. After graduating from college I spent a few years working, traveling, and thinking about whether or not to go back to school (I read a lot about grad school during that time). Did I really want to do research? If so, what would I study? I decided that I wanted to go to grad school so that I could teach biology and do research at the college level, and for that you need a Ph.D. In ecology it is relatively common for people to skip a Masters degree if they have enough research/work experience when they apply, either from their undergraduate education or experiences after that.

I spent hours upon hours researching different graduate programs in ecology (chronicled here, here, and here). I applied during the 2006-07 academic year and began grad school in fall 2007. Now I'm two and a half years into my program. I have completed all of the necessary coursework, identified a research topic, and collected some preliminary data. I organized a committee of scientists (ecogeofemme has been writing about this process recently) who advise me and approved my research topic in my preliminary exam (aka prelims). I expect that it will take me three and a half more years to finish my data collection, analyze it, and write my dissertation. Six years to complete a Ph.D. in ecology is very normal in the U.S. When I finish my Ph.D., I'm not sure exactly what I'll do, but it is likely that I will spend a few more years 'in training' as a post-doctoral fellow (aka post doc).

Pros and cons of being an ecologist? For me I think it's mostly pros. I wrote a post in 2008 that covers many of them. I loved my biology classes in college and I had great professors. Cons? Most ecologists don't have enormous earning potential compared to other fields requiring similar or fewer years of education, but this is only a problem if for some reason your life plans involve needing to be very wealthy.

My advice to Sarah and other young aspiring ecologists is to learn how to learn in whatever classes you take. Figure out how you learn math most effectively. Learn how to find the information you need using search terms and databases.  Learn how to understand the science from reading about it. Make connections between different classes and subjects. Learn how to write well. Those skills will help you succeed in whatever you decide to do. As far as helping you decide what to do with your life, don't stress about it too much now, but do ask people who have interesting jobs how they got there. At the very least, you're bound to get some interesting stories that might help inform your choices down the road.

Databases

I am involved in more than one project involving databases that vary is size and complexity. Thankfully, I don't have to do all (or even most) of the database work myself. I am coming to appreciate the immense value of a skilled database designer.

Last fall I spent weeks learning a new program and designing a database so that I could more easily enter and then manipulate my data, only to give up when I couldn't figure out how to make it do the queries I needed. I got some help during the process from a department lab tech who has experience with databases, but he didn't know the particular program I was using. Today we talked about my database again (he knows I gave up on it a few months ago), and he wants to use it to teach himself the program! He wants to work on my database for free. I'm thrilled! Maybe it will be usable after all.

Carbon offsets

The research that I have chose requires that I travel once or twice a year to Africa for field work. While I hope that the research I do will contribute to conservation of natural resources, I feel that it is also appropriate for me to offset the emissions resulting from my air travel. However, I am overwhelmed by the multitude of options for how to do so. I don't feel well-informed enough to evaluate different carbon offset schemes. Tackling this is one of my goals for 2010. So, dear readers, I ask for your advice.

Have you offset your carbon dioxide emissions? If so, how? Why did you choose that one?
Have you researched different options for carbon offsets? If so, what resources did you find most useful?

I am interested in anything you've got.